She’s gorgeous. BUT! I’ve made the decision not to hit on her.
This girl has come to a strange land is really nervous. She’s coming to a school where everyone, even the teachers speak a language she’s not fluent in. She can’t understand half of what people are saying when they speak to her.
And to top it off, basically every douchebag in school is calling dibs on her.
I refuse to be part of that. It’s going to be difficult for me, but I’m going to stop at friends with this girl so that she can go back to her home and know that at least there was one boy not trying to get in her pants.
This all being said I was completely unable to form words, let alone say them when I saw her.
But I’m keeping it in my pants god damn it! And this clearly innocent and kind stranger will not leave this country without experience the warm embrace of a Ben hug.
So there’s a foreign exchange student coming in to the sophomore class tomorrow and staying for some time, but I honestly have no clue.
Now I feel bad for her because she’s German. And although I don’t really know anything about what girls in Germany look like, from what I can tell from the reactions of all the guys hearing about her arrival is that apparently she’s expected to be pretty attractive.
Now honestly I have no clue what she looks like or how she acts, but I know this for a fact.
About 70% of our schools male population are single, horny, and either nerds, douchebags or a combination of the two.
If this poor girl is as innocent and cute as these men believe her to be. We are looking at a sausage infested death-trap.
My mom’s not mad at me anymore because I stuck it to her this morning.
She said in an angry tone “Have a good day!” and I didn’t respond. She yelled at me and I told her to get to work. She yelled at me some more and said things that really upset me.
Then she demanded that she was going to drive me to school. I told he fuck that, I’m mad at you.
She threatened to take away my keys and of course didn’t. But what she did do is tell me that I couldn’t drive because I was to angry and shouldn’t be driving. Then she told me I needed to grow up. To this I responded “Yes, yes I do. But I’m sixteen. You also need to grow up just as much or more than I do, and you sure as hell aren’t sixteen.” Then she put it in reverse, stomped on the gas, pulled out of the driveway without looking and floored it up the hill.
I then preceded to drive to school with a very level head. In fact that’s probably the most polite I have ever been behind the wheel.
Hey my son is doing really well! His life is going great as a matter of fact… can’t have that now can we.
Lets see now. He’s really happy, we’ve been considering taking him out of therapy because he’s doing so well, and he just finished talking on the phone with his father, lets see what I can do with this.
Ask what they’re talking about.
Demand an explanation as to the topic of the discussion.
Yell at him when he says it’s nothing.
Inform him that it is my business.
Get mad at him and walk away only to come back and make him look like the bad guy (do this 5 times).
Leave for 3 hours.
Come back and repeat step 5.
Finish dinner without saying a single word to him.
Drink a few glasses of wine to scare him after what happened with his dad.
Yell “GOOD NIGHT!” and stomp upstairs.
Wait for his eventual apology and when he does apologize make him look like a villain again.
Well guess what mother dearest. I’m tired of this shit and you get no apology. I will ignore you completely if this is how you’re going to act to me.
Become more mature or I will be my own parent. I’ve done it before. I will do it again if you force my hand.
Mom: So what do you want to do? It’s totally your choice.
Me: I don’t care. Whatever I’m told to do, what does it matter.
Mom: You know, I thought you had a mind of your own! I wish you’d just say what you think and learn to do what you want and not always what you’re told.
Me: I’ve decided to do this.
Mom: Umm, what? No. Why am I the last to know all the time?
Me: You’re not. You told me to make my own decisions and live my own life, so I am.
Mom: But that’s not what I want.
Me: Well… yeah, that’s likely to happen if I stop doing everything you tell me to do.
Mom: It’s just really hurtful that you won’t let me say what I think you should do. And it just makes me angry.
Me: Well it seems every time I listen to you you convince me that I’m the bad guy and that my choices are always wrong.
Mom: But you have to learn.
Me: And how the hell am I supposed to learn if you make every choice for me? How does one learn without getting any experience. And it doesn’t help that every time I express to you how I feel you go away and then charge back at me yelling about how everything I do is wrong. That’s just not fair.
You know what mom? Fine. You win, now I’ll do everything you tell me to do and you can just tell to stop acting like a mindless puppet again. We’ll make a cycle out of it.